"A call for revolution wrapped in the clothing of rationality." 

Some wolves we can trust. Some we can't. Either way, they're all wearing the same thing. 

... That would be sheep clothing, for those of you who didn't understand the reference. 

They're talking about shutting down the government AGAIN?? 

Seriously, when did politics become nothing more than hostage tactics? 

I feel like people who assume you need to take yourself seriously to be a parent really don't understand kids.

Like, have you met kids before? They run around naked, wear their underwear on their head, unknowingly blame their farts on you when in public, and lift up your skirt so they can wear it on their head while giving the neighbors a free show. 

If I can raise my children to be successful adults while still maintaining the awe and carefree wonder of a child, that will be enough. Let them be little and don't get mad when they throw up in your mouth. 

I've said multiple times how much I enjoy the use of satire as a platform for bringing about change. People are generally stubborn and don't appreciate being told they are wrong. It's that "show me, don't tell me mentality". 

Plus it works for me because I'm generally a sarcastic asshole. 

But what I can't understand, what shouldn't need satire, what deserves our complete respect, and shouldn't even be a question is our soldiers. 

The men and women who fight and have fought for this country deserve better. 

"My child no longer enjoys school. Now it's hard!" 

No worries. The fancy Mcdonalds computer will do all the math for them! 

There seems to be an awful lot of people running around proclaiming "God Wills It!" 

Let's do the time wrap again. 

What's next, the Bubonic Plague?? 

... shit 

Hopefully sending in the National Guard will help alleviate the Ferguson situation. 

You know, the guys that are actually military, that have trained extensively in the use of military equipment and how to engage civilians, and not just a police force playing dress up for the day? 

Do you remember when Americans flocked to the cause of banning the dog eating festival in China? Now, I'm not saying I'd EVER eat dog ... but I'm pretty sure if Nepal and India asked us to stop eating cow because bovine is considered sacred to them ... they'd be told to get fucked. 

Just because we have a big stick doesn't mean we get to call the shots for everyone else. Respect is respect. Sure would be shitty if foreign countries could pull that whole "religious freedom" card and start asking for special favors. But they'd again then be told to get fucked because this county is built by god fearing Christians damn it! Only they get religious freedom. 

Before Facebook, how did we ever know people loved each other or enjoyed life?  

When people look back at what was accomplished by the human race in 2014, I hope it goes beyond finding out what lipstick Kylie Jenner wears. 

Turns out you really can't have your cake and eat it too. Which means religious equality is religious equality.

Go Satan. 

You can't tell a religious person "no" because they merely view it as persecution from the oppressor that renews their efforts to keep trying. It's like a hydra ... Cut off one head and two grow back. 

Which is why religion needs to stay out of politics or we'll be chasing our tails until the cows come home. 

If someone was wearing a shirt that said "Murder Me!" and they ended up being murdered, no one would question if it was the victims fault--if the victim wanted it, was acting inappropriately, or was walking home alone.

So if clothes have nothing to do with crime, why is inappropriate sexual advances and, ultimately, rape justifiable by "what she was wearing"? Not to mention women get shit no matter what they're wearing. Taylor Swift (don't really appreciate some of her lyrics but the example serves) performed in jeans and a black turtle neck and headlines were made regarding her "body hugging black outfit". 

For hells sake ..